Flight of the Living Dead (2007)

Flight of the Living Dead (2007)

Flight of the Living Dead (2007) You read that right: this movie’s based on a pun. A fucking pun.

And like most things based entirely on puns, it’s a gigantic piece of shit. Alright, maybe I’m not giving this one a fair shake. Maybe I should overlook the fact that Flight of the Living Dead (2007) tried to capitalize on the bizarro success of Snakes on a Plane (2007).

Maybe its successful screening at the Fantastia Festival really did mean something. Maybe this isn’t just one among a sea of straight-to-DVD ‘00s zombie romps modeled on the Dawn of the Dead (2004) remake. Or wait…..was that just a joke about veganism? A love triangle where two folks hook up in an airplane bathroom? Oh and another joke about vegetarians?

Nah, I think I was right. A Blockbuster bargain-bin buy for a billion high-schoolers binging booze for the first time. That’s the best a man can get from this one.

Planely Braindead:

Flight of the Living Dead (2007)

Flight of the Living Dead (2007)

So there’s this plane. Only it’s one of those weird movie planes that’s obscenely large — like it has spiral steps and a million aisles and shit. So on this plane some scientists have smuggled a container with a scientist’s body, a guy who was infected with a corpse-reanimating virus meant to be used as a war weapon to strengthen army men. Everyone on the plane is either a scientist or hot blonde, and massive thunderstorm turbulence sets the zombie scientist corpse free. Yadda yadda yadda zombie outbreak.

I find the look of ‘00s zombie flicks really, really boring. The film has this really dark palette, the gore all looks the same (ample blood spurt, but never enough guts), and everything’s just so….digital. 28 Days Later (2002) breaks the mold by means of artistic intention, but most everything else just looks like Zone of the Dead (2007): shadowy and crappy.

Tut, Tut, Looks Like Umbrella to the Dome:

Flight of the Living Dead (2007)

Flight of the Living Dead (2007)

Kudos to one zombie umbrella death: an umbrella stab straight through the dome that pops open on the other side of a zombie woman’s cranium. Other than that, maybe you just have to be inebriated to enjoy this one? For the sober, check out this groovy Flash site and debate how much the opening theme sounds like Ashlee Simpson: a tonne or a shit tonne? (Bonus points for the bullshit manga Nightmare Before Christmas visuals in that vid).

Anyway, I never thought I would wish we could head back to the production standards of those Italian ‘70s and ‘80s zombie exploitation flicks. Those movies had heart, man. They were made by insane people. They made you question the morals of those who made them. They made you scared, and they made you queasy. Flight of the Living Dead does nothing for a horror fan. I can see a casual moviegoer getting a kick out of it, because it’s a zombie movie! How silly! But there’s just nothing new brought to the table here.

Director Scott Thomas was also supervising producer of the X-Men animated series, plus one episode of Gargoyles. Go watch those. Dude, I don’t know. You’ll enjoy them more.

Watch ‘Flight of the Living Dead’ below:

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Written by: Ben Mueller